Zombiemom

Friends of ours from T's and K's daycare just had a baby boy, their second child.  After 63 grueling hours of labor, he entered the world at 7lbs7oz.  A beautiful bundle of joy that I won't be visiting anytime soon.

Its not that I don't want to see the adorable little newborn and the beaming happy parents.  But, I have two very good reasons for not visiting in the near future.

1: I'm sick with a cough.  Enough said.  No one should ever go visit a newborn if they are sick.

2: I don't want to burst their bubble.

Let me clarify #2 a little bit.

I'm exhausted.  I haven't slept for more than 4 hours in a night for a long, long time.  Too often, 4am is when I start my day.  Even if I can get K to have a good sleeping night, something else fills the void.  Door bells being rung at midnight, T coming into our room asking where her binky is, our dog barking at something outside or just being creepy (seriously, why does he stand between us at night and just stare??!!).

Sure our new parents-of-2 friends are also tired.  Their first is just about 3 years old, and after 3 days of labor, I know they are wiped out.  But that's a different kind of tired.  You have a whole lot of adrenaline going, you're excited about your growing family, you've been able to store up some reserves for the sleep drain that's coming.  Nearly 8 months after K's arrival, I am plain worn out.  I don't have anything left.  There's no adrenaline, no reserves.  I'm running on empty.  I can't remember where I park my car anymore, and I can barely make a full sentence.

So, even if I weren't sick, I still wouldn't be visiting our friends right away.  Just the sight of me might send them into tailspins regarding the adventure they are now on and fill them with questions and doubt.  They deserve to be able to go into this era blindly, blissfully, ignorantly happy with thoughts of "I know we can, I know we can" chanting in their heads.  They'll figure it out soon enough.  By that point, hopefully, we're in a different phase ourselves where the little people in our home are sleeping soundly through the night and I can look back and say, "Oh, yeah.  That was rough, but you'll get through it," with some element of confidence.

So, Congrats M, K, and big sister A!  I hope you didn't actually read this and lose all hope!  Get whatever rest you can!  I'll be bringing you dinner soon, even if I only leave it at the doorstep and run!


yep, that looks about right.