Me vs. the StinkBug Part Two

Say hello to my little friend...

(If you missed part one, click here)

Friday morning, finally.  Thursday nights are rough with the kids and B working late, but it was Friday and that meant the weekend and sleeping in until 5:30am - woohoo! (there really should be a scarstic font)  I had pressed snooze once and was running a bit late.  K decided to go back to waking up twice a night and I was more tired than usual.  Rushing, I was trying to make up for lost time.  That 9 minute snooze seemed like a great idea and was heavenly while tucked in and warm under my 17 blankets, but now I was regretting it.  Drying, brushing, brushing, flossing, hurrying through my morning routine.  I turned around to leave my bathroom when I saw him.

He was back.

He was in my bathroom.

And, he was looking at me.

Okay, breathe, breathe.  Get yourself together.  You're the only one awake.  You'll look ridiculous if you wake up B screaming about another stinkbug.  Calm down, calm down, calm down.

He was walking towards me.

Oh no, oh no, ohnoohnoohnoohnoohno!!!!

I grabbed the tall, hard plastic cup from the shower, the one I use to rinse the girls' hair in the tub and quickly and gently placed it over the vermin.  It's okay, I'll bleach it later.

Ok, ok, ok.  Back to business.  Just finish getting ready.  When you're all done, you'll slide a piece of paper underneath, go down stairs and take him outside.  The girls aren't up yet.  You just have to be quiet so you don't wake them up and freak them out.  YOU CAN DO THIS!

I finished getting dressed, but unfortunately, my shoes were down stairs.  This made me feel particularly vulnerable.  I didn't want to just shake him out the window or just outside the door because if I did that and he jumped back at me... well, that was a thought I couldn't entertain.  I would just slide my shoes on downstairs, take him out to the tree and let him go.

I timed the extraction with B heading downstairs so he could hold the stair gate and door open for me.  I ran outside, straight for the tree and removed the piece of paper holding the bug in the cup.

But, he wasn't on the paper.

I hesitated, but made myself look inside the cup (he won't jump, he won't jump, he won't jump...).

He wasn't there either.

AAGRGRHAGARGRGAHAGGRHAGARHRGAHAGRHARGAGRHARGAGRHA!

Where is that stupid, disgusting, smelly, ugly, annoying, going to crawl all over my face in my sleep bug!!!!!!

Running upstairs, I searched the bathroom, the bedroom, the old hiding spot (under the dresser of course) but couldn't locate the nasty thing.

For the last 4 hours, I have been twitching, squirming, itching, and dying a little inside.  Is he on me?  Is he on my pillow?  I'm never going to sleep again.

Stink Bug - 2, Mommy - 0

Mark my words Stinky, this is NOT OVER!!!

Me vs. the StinkBug (Part 1)

It had been a hectic and exhausting afternoon.  Work was crazy, I had to run to catch the shuttle bus and I was still running.  Running to pick up the girls from daycare, running home, running to get them fed, bathed, dressed and in bed in order to have dinner ready for when B got home, having worked late that night.  On nights like these, I know I'm short tempered and stressed and T definitely picks up on that.  She was resisting all my efforts: won't get into the tub, won't get out of the tub, won't, won't, wont.  Sigh.

As I sat on the bathroom floor, trying to calm my stressed out nerves, I looked just outside the doorway to see a new visitor in our house - the StinkBug.

Being a biologist, I try to make every effort not to be grossed out by the creepy crawlies in front of T and K.  I want them to grow up fascinated by the world around them and not inherit my irrational fear of spiders.  In general, I don't really mind bugs.  I had T once help me rescue a giant caterpillar from the street and I'll be the first one to pick up a lady bug.  But there's something about bugs invading my personal space, my private refuge, being where they have absolutely no right to be, that just-drives-me-crazy!

I was frozen, staring, at this innocent little stinker, crawling his way across my dog's bed.

"Mommy, look at me!"
"Uh-huh"
"No, MOMMY, LOOK at me!"
"That's nice sweetie" all without tearing my eyes away from the invader.

Somehow, I had to remove the little bugger, without squishing it, without alerting T, without squealing, and GET HIM OUT OF MY BEDROOM!!!!!

Images of that thing crawling all over me in my sleep were giving me the chills and upping the levels of stress I was already feeling.

Unfortunately, not being the center of my attention made T all the crankier and I ended up bringing her to her room for a time out - two birds with one stone because now I could get rid of the bug without her seeing!

I ran back to my room only for the thing to have disappeared in thin air!  How was I ever going to sleep again!  On all fours, I searched the floor of my bedroom, under the dog bed, under the dresser, but I couldn't find him!  That's how B found me that night, desperately trying to find Stinky, shaking with overloaded stress and anxiety, and T back in my room jumping on the bed.

"What's wrong with Mommy, Daddy?"

I had located the bug, on an old shirt under the dresser.  As I pulled him out, (squealing, oh well), B grabbed it, put it in a plastic bag, and brought him directly to an all you can eat feast in our trash can.  I'm ashamed to say, I actually cried with relief.

"Mommy, don't cry."  Sorry babe, too late.  The rest of the night I alternated between thanking B, apologizing for my irrational behavior, and crying.

StinkBug - 1, Mommy - 0

But it wasn't over yet...