Mail Surprise!

Working hard on my thesis and defense presentation.  All that writing has me a little burned out.  Want an excerpt?

"TLR2 has been linked with detection of LCMV.  In vitro and in vivo cytokine responses to LCMV infection were found to be TLR2-dependent.  IL-8, in vitro, and IL-6 and MCP-1 in vivo, were all found to be TLR2- and MyD88-dependent (357).  Unexpectedly, IFN-I production in mice was also found to require TLR2, but not MyD88.  However, recent studies have shown that some viral ligands are able to induce IFN-I production through TLR2 on the endosome, while bacterial ligands could not, demonstrating the plasticity of TLR2 functions (19).  Further, the proinflammatory responses observed during LCMV infection of CNS glial cells was determined to be TLR2, MyD88, and Mal dependent (355).  Beyond innate immune responses, MyD88 has been identified as a critical component of the adaptive T cell response to LCMV infection.  MyD88 deficient mice are unable to control viral replication or spread in a manner that doesn’t involve IL-1R1, IL-18R, or IPS-1 (23, 149, 356, 357).  LCMV-specific CD8+ and CD4+ T cells have impaired functionality in the absence of MyD88 leading to a reduced cytotoxic T cell response (149, 268, 356)."

Asleep yet?  You're welcome to any insomniacs out there!

Anyways, with February 24th looming on the not-so-distant horizon, I do have a fun story to share!

Remember when you used to get actual mail?  Cards, packages, even bills?  Remember when every now and then, you would get a complete surprise?  Sure, now I'm surprised when I'm actually home to receive my recent online purchase, but when was the last time you were really surprised (in a good way) by something that arrived in the mail?!

Well, last week, I came home to find not one, but two slips indicating that I had missed package deliveries.  One I was expecting (online maternity purchase).  The other - I had no idea.  I pestered B about.  Surely it was for him or he knew what it was.  Nope.  It was a couple of days before I was able to get to the post office.  My mind was racing.  Who was it for?  What could it be?  To my surprise, it was for me, marked "FRAGILE" and from B's cousin Kristyn.  WHAT??!!

When I got home, I hesitated opening it.  OK, I tore into the outer paper wrapping and found a bubble wrapped box, congratulating one "Dr. Hayes" with a card.  Being a little superstitious (I'm not quite there yet), I almost waited to open it.  OK, so I opened it so carefully that I could tape it back together perfectly in case I was supposed to wait until I was done.  Not really sure why I did that...  Anyhoo, here is what I was greeted by...

A whole box of these adorable Hazmat gingerbread guys!  Aren't they cute?

Each one was individually placed in a zipper bag and layered with bubble wrap.

I love this guy!  He reminds me of, well, me, looking out from the BSL-3 lab.  "Let me out! Let me out!"

After a couple of quality control tastings, the rest were placed in the freezer to preserve them for my committee members after my defense.  If these guys don't sweeten them up to pass me, I don't know what will!

I have to send a HUGE thank you to Kristyn, her mom Anne, and Grandma for the card and for making these for me!  I love them so much!  I might have squealed with delight when I saw them.  Maybe. :)  Love you guys!

Gah!

Ok, I thought it was bad when my December looked like this.  But now my days are even worse!

Today, fexample, (taking a deep breath...):
drop T off at daycare this morning
came home to take the dog out one more time
made the spinach artichoke dip for one of three Christmas parties tomorrow that I will bake at 5:00 am tomorrow morning
ran into work to get an experiment started by 9:00 am because it has specific timed steps throughout the day (at 10, 11, 12, 1, 3, 4, and again at 9 and 10pm)
pick up T after work
come home
get ready for B's holiday party (fancy event, I'll be posting my first "What I Wore" post, complete with my DIY bead and ribbon necklace and sweater to cardigan refashion)
go back to work after the party (yep you read that right)
come home and collapse.  Phew!

Oh, by the way, I'm 24 weeks pregnant, still getting sick, trying to resubmit a paper, write my thesis and defend my thesis next month. 

Ok, that's enough of my pity party.  Thanks for letting me get that out!

On a positive note, we are nearly finished getting the Christmas cards mailed out, the above mentioned spinach artichoke dip looks amazing (had to stop myself from eating it raw), and I get to go to a fancy dinner party tonight.  Woohoo!

Because I need to add some cuteness to my otherwise self-indulgent vent storm, here is T singing happy birthday on the way home yesterday!

When I grow up...

It seems that I've been on a particular path for about 87.9% of my life (I actually did the math).  My mom will tell you that from an early age I wanted to be a scientist, wear a lab coat, figure out life, and save the world.  I was always organized (my dolls were arranged in order of size and then based on the color of their outfits, I know, ridiculous), curious, and wanting to know more.  Through high school, I elected to take as many biology classes as I could and went to college for a BS in Biotechnology.  I worked for 6 years as a Research Associate, doing the "research" that other people wanted, not really finding my purpose.  I was starting to get "itchy".  I wanted more than that.  So I went back to school to get my PhD.

Fast forward 5+ years, and here I am, approaching the end of my graduate school career, mere months away from defending my thesis research and earning the elusive title of "Doctor of Philosophy in Molecular Microbiology and Immunology".  I'm also finding that I have no idea what I want to do afterwards.

Huh?

I've been working toward this goal my entire life: to be a scientist, figure out life, and save the world.  Now I'll have the credentials I need to do my own research, to go on and have the most productive research lab in the history of research and get that Nobel Prize by the ripe age of 40.  Right?

Except... now I have a family.

For someone who never even entertained the idea of kids, I love being a mom and its my biggest priority (right after being a good wife!).  My daughter is my world.  I fall asleep thinking of her and wake up thinking of her and every moment in between.  It's also been the most universally challenging and guilt-ridden job I've ever had.  Normally at work, I know immediately (or within a few days) if I've messed up.  I won't know until she's an adult if I've done irreparable damage!

So now, I find myself with completely different priorities than that 4 year old little girl who dreamed of saving the world through science.  I still love it and find it completely fulfilling, but it competes with the time I can spend with my family.  If I stay on the path  I've been on, my days and evenings (and yes, even weekends) will be filled with grant applications, traveling to speaking engagements and conferences on top of research and teaching.  Is there some sort of compromise?  I wish I had the answer.

As I approach the end of my endentured servanthood (i.e. grad student), I am weighing my options.  How important is it to me to do actual research?  Are there other ways I can contribute to society within my field?  What else can I do with my degree?  I've only done research, am I capable of something else?

I've learned a few things from countless seminars, job fairs, etc.  One is that a path one takes to their ultimate profession is never straight.  There are lots of bumps, wrong turns and detours along the way.  It's okay for me to try something else, even if it doesn't work out.  I've also learned that it's never too late to reinvent yourself.  In fact, in this workplace and economy, it's almost essential that you do so every 5-10 years.  Alright, so maybe my next move isn't the decisive factor in who I will be.  Maybe its just a stepping stone or specific experience that makes me stand out in a crowd.  Maybe I don't need to put so much pressure on my choices now.  Maybe I'm ready to try something new.  After all, I tried being a mom and look how much I love that!

Linking up at The Anderson Family Crew

Panic button!

Ok, ok, I know.  My posts have been a bit fewer these days.  Between my sister actually requesting more blog updates and the new tab screen on Internet Explorer saying that blogger has been "less active", I've received the message, loud and clear!

The thing is, I've actually spent a great deal of time writing lately, my thesis that is!  I am aspiring to graduate this December, defending my thesis on December 2nd.  That's the plan and what I've been working towards ever since I found out my boss was leaving the university and I had better get my act in gear.  All along, I've been thinking "December, I have time.  December, I have time..."  Last week, B said to me, "Are you going to be able to finish in two months?"  Two months, who was he kidding, I had until December!  Except that it was the end of September and I'm defending on the second day of December, so really, yeah, two months.

(Here's where I go into a spiral of panic!)

I've been working on the same three experiments/goals since July with limited success.  I've finally finished my first author paper manuscript and got that off my to do list, now my actual thesis is looming in front of me (all while trying to finish those same three experiments).  ARRRGGGHHH!

So, I apologize if I haven't updated more, but between being nauseous (and throwing up in the morning), researching, reading and writing for my thesis, and trying to get these last darn experiments to work when everything in the world of research that can go wrong will, I just haven't been able to do many blog updates.  (Seriously, between cell contamination, my incubator breaking, and my supplies being back ordered, what else can go wrong?  No.  Wait.  I'd rather not find out, thank-you-very-much.)

I have found some time to do some crafting.  I'll try to write some updates about those very soon.  Here are some hints, courtesy of pinterest (are you following me there yet?  check it out! http://pinterest.com/melissa_w_hayes)

Source: makingmemorieswithyourkids.blogspot.com via Melissa on Pinterest

Source: etsy.com via Melissa on Pinterest

Source: kikicreates.blogspot.com via Melissa on Pinterest

I'm also doing some custom dresses for a friend for their annual family photo shoot.  The material just came in this weekend and is waiting to be washed.  Their two adorable girls will be wearing pillowcase dresses in these fabrics:

So that's the update.  I'm about to get waist deep in the exciting details of the "inflammasome".  If you're interested, maybe I'll write a post about what I actually research.  Since you're probably not interested, I'll write some updates about my craft projects very soon.  Pinky swear!